


Judd in Wonderland

by nanatanz



Category: Big Mouth (Cartoon)
Genre: Action/Adventure, F/M, M/M, Mystery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-06
Updated: 2019-02-06
Packaged: 2019-10-23 12:50:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17683796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanatanz/pseuds/nanatanz
Summary: Judd Birch tries to navigate the last summer before senior year of high school when he's thrown into a sinister conspiracy he never cared to be a part of in the first place.





	1. Dog Days

Hi everyone, welcome to Judd in Wonderland! Judd is a complex character and this story is my attempt at unraveling his personality while keeping true to his portrayal in Big Mouth. This story is rated for: language, lewdness, and loads of gore. Please rate and review! :) 

P.S. I do not own Big Mouth or its characters.

....

"Cut it out Judd! Why d'you have to be such a jerk!" Leah screeched and slammed her door, the noise reverberating around the house. The man in question cackled at the fake tarantula he'd dropped onto Leah's bed from the vents. His sister had screamed bloody murder and nearly vaulted her grande iced mocha latte onto her laptop.

Judd looked at her girlishly-decorated door with disinterest. Well, that hadn't turned out as fun as he'd hoped. Not that he cared about Leah's stupid pastimes anyway.

He slunk into his own room and sat on the bed. Summer had just started and he was already growing bored of the intense heat and lack of mental stimulation. He'd NEVER tell anyone but secretly he liked going to school. Well, aside from the gay-ass theater club and abysmally long homework assignments thanks to his bitch counselor who signed him up for higher-level classes because "Judd your standardized test scores are incredible!" He may not look like it, but he definitely wasn't dumb. This was all a ploy by the system anyway, and Judd knew how to play the game. Bombard students with a shit ton of useless information and "test" them by how much they can mindlessly regurgitate in x-number of days.

He didn't care about acing his classes but he definitely wasn't planning on flunking out of high school because come on, the contraband market in college was the holy mother of tits. The seventeen-year-old grinned to himself. One more year of high school until he could move out of this suffocating house and be free. His thoughts were interrupted by raucous laughter from the yard. He looked out the window. His retarded faggot brother and his faggot ginger friend ran around playing some idiotic version of frisbee with water guns.

Maybe he should go check out that new bar whose opening was plastered all over every inch of social media. He mentally cringed at all the hipsters who'd be first in line and claim they'd been there "before it was cool," like no dumbass it just opened. As he passed the kitchen, he rolled his eyes at his parents cooing at each other while making dinner. That was something he would definitely not miss tonight. The sight of his decal-covered car in the garage made him smile. This was his happy place, where he could blast all the trashy music he wanted without his family banging on his door to turn the volume down. There was movement in the driveway and his head turned to see his irritating little neighbor, a 6-year-old girl who always came over uninvited because his mom made the best damn cookies, not that he'd ever say that out loud.

She didn't go toward the front door though, and kept peering up at him through her thick, auburn bangs. He looked at her warily.

"What are you staring at you creepy-ass fuck," he hissed, hoping his foul language would send her bawling back to her own fucking house. But no, she just stood there with that blank expression on her face. He shrugged, getting into his car and starting the engine. He backed out of the driveway, but to his dismay the girl moved behind his car. If he kept backing up he'd run the little rat over. He groaned with frustration.

"The fuck is wrong with you? Get the hell away from my car." He didn't expect her to listen but she did. She walked toward the grass and turned to face him. He took his chance and powered it off the driveway and onto the street. As he started driving, he checked his rear-view mirror. Yep, still staring that creepy stare. Judd frowned but soon forgot about it as he jacked up the volume to his favorite band. The jarring chords of electric guitar filled the entire ride until he decided to park in some seedy alleyway.

It was nearing dusk but the air was still hot and humid. Noisy chatter surrounded him and Judd felt slightly sweaty in his navy T-shirt and black jeans. People parted for him like he was a tidal wave or some shit. Must have been the angry scowl on his face. He scoffed at the girls giving him appreciative glances. They only did so because they didn't go to his school and had no idea what kind of reputation he'd built for himself. Judd the loner. Judd the future convict. Judd the intelligent boy who was wasting his potential climbing vents and being an overall outcast. 

Any girls, even boys, who'd liked him in high school quickly changed their minds once they'd discovered just how...different Judd was. He didn't care to make friends, didn't care to join any clubs. He did his work quietly and had a strange sense of humor that no one really found funny. His essays, though well above average, were uncomfortable to read and his vocabulary even in school had landed him more than one detention. Did he even like girls? Was he gay? Bi? Hell if Judd even knew. He was so tired of the fake, people-pleasing sycophants that comprised his class, he didn't even know what kind of hole he'd want to stick his dick into.

The bar slowly came into view, and so did the long line. Fuck, he thought. He wasn't about to stand in this long-ass line in this heat. Maybe he should leave, this wasn't even worth-

"Hey man, looking to get inside?" Judd turned and was face-to-face with a sharply-dressed teenager. The guy was your typical prep: plaid button-down tucked neatly into pressed shorts, sandy-blonde hair perfectly coiffed by copious amounts of gel and pomade, and douchey-looking aviators to complete the look. Judd frowned darkly and tried to ignore the irritating snap of the other guy's gum.

"What's it to you?" He asked suspiciously. The guy laughed, "I don't know man, you just look like you wanna get in." He tapped Judd's bicep and motioned with his hand.

"Come on, I'll take you to the back entrance. My aunt owns this place so it's chill." He started walking behind the bar without even checking if Judd was following or not. Judd frowned again and followed. They walked along the outer brick of the building and stopped at a door painted black to look like the rest of the bricks. The door practically vibrated with the music pounding inside. The guy fished out a ring of keys out of his magenta shorts. He slid a key in and gave Judd a smirk.

"Can I at least buy you a drink once we get inside?" His eyebrows rose teasingly behind the opaque silver of his sunglasses. Judd sneered. This guy was unbelievable.

"Yeah whatever, but if this place fucking sucks I'm out," he retorted. The guy laughed.

"I promise, my dude, you're not gonna regret coming here." He finally hauled open the door and upbeat music poured out into the alleyway. The guy grabbed Judd's arm, not flinching when Judd visibly squirmed at the physical contact. "By the way, the name's Chase," he smacked his minty-smelling gum. Judd reared back, "don't."

Chase smiled, "s'nice to meet you, Don't." He lowered his aviators a bit, revealing his hazel-colored eyes. "I know your name's Judd." He chuckled on seeing Judd's eyes widen. "It's chill man, I saw it on your fake ID." Chase pointed down where sure enough, Judd's fake ID was somewhat sticking out of his ass pocket. It was well-made for sure, but a seasoned faker could easily point it out. Nevertheless, they didn't even need IDs as Chase expertly led them down a well-lit hallway and into the main room. Even Judd was impressed. The high ceilings and walls were artfully painted red and black with tasteful portraits of the four card suits. A glowing fountain bubbled in the back corner, revealing a short set of stairs that led to the dance floor.

"Welcome to Queens!" Chase shouted over the loud music. Judd tried to free his arm but Chase kept walking toward the bar. The woman working behind the counter gave Judd a once-over and raised an eyebrow at Chase. "The usual?" She drawled. Chase held up two fingers and she nodded, getting to work. Judd finally wrenched his arm away.

"What'd you get, some girly-ass drink that matches your outfit?" Judd snarled, annoyed at having been led around like a pet. Chase took his time removing his glasses and folding them up before placing them in his shirt pocket. His hazel eyes looked eerie in the light and he leaned into Judd. "I got us two gin and tonics!" He said proudly and produced them from the slick counter. Judd scowled but took a gulp of his drink. The gin-to-tonic ratio was pleasantly high and he relished the familiar burn of alcohol. It was no whiskey but for now it would do.

The night wore on as Chase kept showing Judd every detail about the bar and where everything was located. The drinks kept coming and Chase insisted on paying for them. Chase moved closer and became more bold with his hands with every minute. Judd wasn't an idiot, he knew where this was going. That lousy sleaze was trying to get lucky tonight. His hand was warm on Judd's waist and rubbing distracting circles over the thin material of his T-shirt. When Chase leaned in to kiss him, Judd had enough and stood up, slightly pitching forward.

"I'm leaving," he said curtly and walked toward the hallway they'd come through. He kept walking, not looking back. But after a moment, he couldn't resist the temptation to turn around. Chase was still sitting on the red couch, watching Judd leave with that stupid smile on his face. His teeth were especially white and his eyes practically glowed in the light. Judd whipped his head forward and didn't stop until he was finally outside. It felt like someone just punched out his eardrums. The music that had been so loud before was now muffled against the door.

Judd walked out of the alleyway and onto the main sidewalk. Even though it was almost midnight, people were still outside enjoying the balmy air. Judd still shivered. Today had been weird- that neighbor girl and now this. He needed to get home and take a shower to clear his head. He stumbled forward. Fuck, he wasn't dumb enough to drive home drunk. How many drinks did he even have? He made his way to the alley where his car was parked. A couple was leaning against the bricks, heavily kissing. The girl had her legs hiked around the guy's waist and her underwear dangled on a heel-clad foot. One of his hands went up under her shirt and squeezed. Judd gagged, turned around, and promptly vomited into the sparse grass. He blinked slowly, he was on his back somehow, and the couple had stopped making out and were hovering above his face. The girl looked concerned, her huge eyes blinking back tears under thick, auburn bangs. Judd's vision blurred and the world turned black.


	2. Crazy Dreams

When Judd finally came to, he couldn't open his eyes. They felt dry and gritty, and his mouth was parched. Kind of like the morning after a night of heavy drinking. The events of last slowly melted back into his brain and Judd opened his eyes. The sky was a clear, cloudless blue and he sat under a tree in a grassy plain. The grass was a deep, rich green and unnaturally lush, like the kind advertised in those landscaping magazines. Judd couldn't think of a single place back home that looked like this. He looked up at the tree and saw various fruits in a spectrum from pink to orange to red. The fruits were also as big as his head. He shivered, what if one had fallen on his head? RIP, he thought, wondering where in the hell he could be.

The plain seemed to stretch like an ocean on all sides, no paths or anything cutting through the grass. He heard a buzzing off in the distance, like a helicopter. Maybe someone could help him out of here. He turned toward the sound and nearly shit himself. The largest fucking dragonfly he'd ever seen came barreling out of nowhere and collided with one of the fruits. The insect was massive, scaly green body glimmering with blue and violet and wings that looked like pieces of opaque mirror glued together. Judd stared, if it wasn't so huge he might have found the thing really cool. He didn't dare move unless he wanted to attract its attention.

"There you are!" A high-pitched voice called out. A girl was racing toward him, from where he had no idea. There was literally nowhere she could've come from because he'd checked all around him. What the fuck was this place? Where had she come from? He took a closer look at her and an eerie chill went down his spine. It was his neighbor, that 6-year-old, but she looked older, like 15 or something. She wore the same white dress she'd worn on his driveway and her auburn hair fell down to the middle of her back. She still had those stupid bangs. He realized he couldn't remember her name despite being neighbors.

"You know, you looked really awful when we found you in that alley," she continued quickly, paying no attention to the car-sized dragonfly currently devouring a fruit above them. She stopped in front of him, examining his face. "You are Judd Birch, yes?" He didn't say anything.

"Then allow me to introduce myself. I am Winny, and we have to go!" She grabbed his arm and began pulling him. Judd snarled and yanked his arm away. "Don't fucking touch me, bitch." He took a step back.

"Where are we? Take me back to that alley." He gave her his darkest scowl but she didn't appear to be fazed. Instead, she looked dejected.

"We must go quickly, Judd, though suppose it's only right if I provide more context," she wrung her hands and fidgeted as if they really were in a hurry. Hell no, he wasn't going anywhere with her until she swore to take him back.

"We are currently in Wonderland, population 63 million with geographical variations ranging from desert to snow-peaked mountains. Depending on where you choose to travel, the climate is mostly mild with extremes at certain locations. The current ruler of this land is the White Queen." She stared at him expectantly, "now come, we really must hurry."

Without waiting for a response, she turned and briskly started walking away from the tree. Judd made no move to follow her and just crossed his arms. A loud crack from above made him look up. The dragonfly landed on another fruit and fixed Judd with a multicolored stare as if daring him to stay under the tree. Judd rolled his eyes and walked toward Winny who was now a considerable distance away.

Looking around him, Judd realized the only way he'd get anywhere was by going with this girl. Everywhere he looked, it was open grasslands with no end in sight. If he didn't have a guide, he'd probably be chewed up by nasty, oversized insects and violently shit out. He swore under his breath and caught up to the girl quickly, his long legs covering more distance than her white ballet shoes.

"Aren't you my neighbor?" Judd asked. Winny's head whipped around, "in a sense," she answered, "I lived there for 6 years with no memory of who I was until we were all awakened some time ago." She looked ahead now and frowned, "your neighbors don't exist anymore. There's a new family living there now and no one remembers them anymore."

"Who are you?" He was getting more confused with each answer she gave.

"I told you, I'm Winny. Look, it's better if you just come with me and meet everyone. We'll explain everything then."

Judd looked ahead and saw, at the base of a nondescript grassy hill, a crawl-sized hole. With a sinking feeling, he had a feeling where they were heading. Sure enough, she crouched in front of the hole. "I'll go first Judd, I know you don't trust me but you have to. Wonderland needs you." She crawled into the hole and noticed Judd hesitating. She sighed, "look around you Judd, where else can you go?" With that, she disappeared into the hole.

He knelt on the soft grass and peered inside. He swallowed and, against all instinct, crawled into the hole. He didn't expect the ground to drastically slope downwards and he pitched forward, rolling blindly in the darkness. His arms grappled to catch hold of something but all he could feel was grass. He suppressed the ridiculous urge to start screaming and after a few moments of terror the ground finally evened out and Judd felt his body being deposited in a heap. He kept his eyes closed. Never let the enemy know you're aware.

Miraculously, nothing was broken and he felt no pain. That sealed it, this had to be a dream. Who the fuck lands like that without a single scratch? Dumb fucks who are dreaming, obviously.

He listened closely, he was in a room of some sort with several people engaged in hushed chatter. From behind his eyelids he could tell the room was well-lit.

"Do you think he's dead? Pshh what a sissy..."

"Hush Abby, he's understandably scared and disoriented!" That was Winny's voice.

"Are you serious?! You expect us to believe he's the one?" What were they talking about?

That's it. Judd slowly opened his eyes. He was on his stomach and his arm was ungracefully pushed under his chest. How mortifying.

Winny gave him a smile, "I knew you'd make it!" She motioned around her, "everyone, this is Judd Birch! The one we've been waiting for."

A young woman with blue hair like a highlighter gave him an unimpressed glance. She had to be like twenty-three or something. Judd sneered at her and rose to his feet. He ignored the others and turned to Winny. "Alright, I came to your stupid pow-wow, now tell me what the hell's going on."

Winny smiled nervously and nodded. She gestured at the blue-haired woman, "this is Abby, and this is Chase!" It couldn't be. Judd frowned at the same boy from yesterday, still wearing those dumb aviators. "You again," Judd hissed. Chase merely smirked behind his glasses and crossed his arms. A thud sounded behind him and he turned to see a young, red-haired man in a black tuxedo who'd landed significantly more elegantly than he had.

The man straightened up and gazed down. He was at least four inches taller than Judd and wider in the shoulders. The guy's muscles rippled under the suit and his blood-red hair was neatly combed back. "Welcome Judd Birch," he stated imperiously, "I am the Queen." Judd scoffed, "queen? Like what, a drag queen?" The Queen's eyebrows shot up and he looked at Judd murderously.

"Such impudence," he snarled and looked at Winny, "how could you ever think this disrespectful delinquent is Wonderland's savior?" Winny squeaked and quickly tried to regain her composure. 

"He's not Wonderland's savior! Not yet at least. He is a little rough around the edges but with time he will see." She nodded as if to emphasize her point. Abby shook her head, "regardless, we need to begin, now."

The Queen stood at the head of a long table and gestured for the other four to sit. "Judd Birch, you are no doubt perplexed by recent events. You must understand that the world you are from is not in fact the only world to exist. You have entered a passageway through time and space to reach Wonderland, a land which is now ruled by an imposter who calls herself the White Queen." Judd groaned inwardly. Everyone here was high and he wanted at least five of what they were on. He'd let them talk for now.

The Queen continued despite Judd's waning attention. "We have seen the coming of our savior from afar. We spent years on your home planet searching far and wide for you, and at last you are here with us." Chase laid a hand on his shoulder and squeezed. Judd ignored him, "when can I leave this dump?"

Instead of being offended, the Queen smiled. "Yes Judd, we have much to discuss now that you are finally here." The red-haired man produced a white card from the folds of his tuxedo. Four stylized card suits adorned the front. The back merely read, "The Queen." When Judd looked back up, Chase was right in his face.

"Sorry about this J.B., but you'll get what you asked for." Chase leaned in and placed a feather-light kiss on Judd's mouth, pulling back with a wide grin. "See ya sunshine." Judd reeled back and felt like a massive fishing line was pulling him back, away from the room and through the grassy tunnel. As he hurtled through the sky, he caught a glimpse of that dragonfly still hacking away at the fruits on the tree. Another tight tug and Judd blacked out.

He gasped as he woke up. He looked around, hyperventilating, and realized he was back in his room. Same navy bed and same black walls with the same graphic posters. He checked his phone on the bedside table. It was yesterday morning...wait, the day he decided to go to that stupid bar. Judd ran a hand through his blue-streaked hair. That was some crazy dream...Although, he quickly looked outside the window toward his neighbors' house and his stomach clenched. There was a moving truck there and a family of four was outside moving furniture. "It was...real?"


End file.
